A Day in the Life

Miserable, mysterious, messy Monday. Here we are again. How has the morning shaped up?

4:00 a.m.- Mazie comes into our room (crashing into things and explaining LOUDLY that she had a nightmare, and I absolutely must sleep in her room now. I made her use the bathroom, and while she did, I asked what the dream was about. She dreamed that wolves were trying to get into the house.

6:00 a.m.- I hear my husband get out of bed and get ready for work. I was not the only one who heard him. As soon as the exterior door closed behind Nathan, Josie decided to climb out of her crib. Now I'm officially awake, sort of.

7:00 a.m.- We discover that, alas, we are still out of eggs, just as we were yesterday when we went to bed. My mother-in-law sends Ethan to the chicken coop to get more. (He loves this job because the coop is at the far end of the field, so he gets to drive the four-wheeler.) He discovers that the lazy chickens (there are eleven of them) have only laid a single egg. We have ham toast for breakfast instead of ham and eggs.

7:15 a.m. Ethan informs me that the four-wheeler tire is flat. Arrrggh! These are the new tires the were Nathan's Christmas present. When we had them put on at Christmastime, the tire shop bent one rim putting them on. So, that tire was always going flat. Finally a few weeks ago, we ordered four new rims for Nate's four-wheeler as his anniversary gift. When they put the tires on the new rims, one of the tires had a bulge in it. Now it's going flat again.

8:00 a.m. Josie is crying. She got up too early.

8:07 a.m. I plug in my dead cell phone, which is the only number by which people know to reach me anymore. There is a new voice mail message from the insurance adjuster telling me that they have determined that the excessive snowfall over the years damaged our chimney and they will pay for it. Now the hole can be patched, and hopefully it won't end up costing us a lot of cash.

8:20 a.m. Josie is crying again.

9:15 a.m I've heard enough of Josie's crying, so I dump her into bed with a bottle. I also run the older kids outside. Ah, a moment of quiet. I think I'll be really smart and take a short nap.

9: 30 a.m.-Awakened by frantic yelling (Mazie) that Ethan has been bitten by a gopher. I go to investigate.

The dog caught the gopher. Ethan was afraid of it, so he took off his shoe and tried to kill it. The gopher got scared and bit the hand behind the shoe. (Smart gopher; not such good judgement on the boy's part.)

"Where's the gopher?" I ask, thinking that I might have to haul it into the health department and have it checked for rabies.

"The dog ate it."

9:45- I call the Health Department nurse, who informs me that the biggest concern with a gopher bite is actually tetanus, and is my son up to date on his immunizations? Yes, he is. Well, it should be fine if you clean the wound thoroughly and sanitize it with hydrogen peroxide. Yep, did that, too. But, she tells me I need to report it to the Environmental Health Department.

10:20- I call ITP, the manufacturer of the ATV tire and talk to a guy about getting a replacement. It should be under warranty.

10:45- Talk to a guy at the Environmental Health Department, who informs me that gophers don't carry rabies, but thank you for reporting the bite. Yes, it wasn't the gopher's fault. He was provoked.

10:55- The bishop calls to ask me to speak in Sacrament meeting this Sunday.

11:00- My friend Michelle from Montana calls. Oh, how I miss Michelle and our BT summers!

11:15- Nathan interrupts my call with Michelle. He is at Fred Meyer because I told him to go to WinCo and get the stuff I need for Josie's birthday cake tomorrow. (Just like a man to think one store is as good as another.) I give him an abbreviated list of things I need and tell him that no, Ethan doesn't need a rabies shot.

Okay, quit laughing! It's not even noon yet!