You know how when people want to inspire you, and they tell you about now-famous people who failed over and over before finding success? They use Henry Ford as example because his first two car companies failed, but the third is well, an American icon. They paint a picture that perseverance is really the most important key to success. This is especially true among writers.
Laurie Halse Anderson, the author of Speak, a Printz Award Honor Book, tried unsuccessfully for eight years to be published. When I started out, that seemed like a really long time. I'll be hitting that milestone soon enough, although I've mostly spent the past eight years writing and sending out a few queries here and there. When I receive enough rejections on a work, I move on to writing something else. That's how I've amassed five shelved manuscripts in addition to the one I'm currently revising.
I've always believed that perseverance is key to success. However, a part of me wonders, "Do you simply lack the talent?" Near success seems like the story of my life. I was always the finalist who never wore the crown. Made the first cut for WSU's cheer squad, but didn't make the team. I've always been good, but never good enough.
And I've wondered (and hoped and prayed) that this pattern isn't going to continue eternally. Because so far, time and again, my best wasn't good enough. When it matters most of all, I really don't want to fail.
Sorry, this post was supposed to be about writing, not my eternal destination, but the same feelings apply. Just how far will perseverance get me? Will there come a day when I finally realized, I simply don't have the talent? The world has J.K. Rowling and Stephenie Meyer. It doesn't need me.
I recently sent my mom 200 pages of my revision. The book is pushing over 400 total, by far the longest work I've written, and also the best. She's pushing hard for me to finish and try to publish it. She reads a lot. She loves this story, and she thinks it's really good. But, she's my mom. (She has to love me.) And there's still that nagging part of me that gives way to doubt some days.
Some people stumble into success. Others pine for it without every grasping it. Days like today, I sit here and wonder, Where in this spectrum do I fall? Will my very best still not be good enough?
25 Years
4 months ago
Eternally I feel the same way. Is my best good enough? Since I've never read your writings I can't really say anything about that but I hope your hard work does pay off.
ReplyDeleteHey Michelle,
ReplyDeleteRemember all of those Young Authors entries that took first place back in elementary school. I think that you've got it in you! Sometimes the reward is that much sweeter when we realize how much time and hard work goes into our masterpieces and we push through to get it done anyway. Good luck!
Janelle
Eternally...if you're doing your best then it doesn't matter because that's where the power of the Atonement comes in. Heavenly Father provided a way to make up for the rest after we've done all that we can do. So, don't sweat the small stuff ;)
ReplyDeleteAs for your book, I cannot wait to read it one day!
I know just what you mean. For me, it's not writing, but the feelings are the same.
ReplyDeleteKeep going! Don't give in! You can do it! If your book is anything like your blogs, something must be wrong with the editors who reject your work. I enjoy your blogs!
ReplyDeleteYou are amazing! I can't believe you even have time to write! I can't wait to read your book, because I am sure it will be published! I always thought you were great at everything that you did!
ReplyDelete